The Christmas Spirit
by marylou
Summary: One evening, a few weeks after his parents' death, a young Severus Snape gets a Christmas visitor.


Lily Evans Potter stood outside the old, beaten down door, shivering against the chill of the biting wind and blowing snow. She hesitantly raised her hand to knock on the door. She waited a few moments, but there was no response. She knocked again, louder. This time she could hear the rasp of a chair moving against the wooden floor and then the sound of footsteps. She stepped back slightly in surprise when the door was flung open and the dark eyes of Severus Snape looked down on her, surprised.

"Yes?" he growled. "What do you want?"

She pulled her coat tighter around herself. "I- I wanted to talk, Severus. May I come in?"

He stared at her, and for a few moments seemed to consider slamming the door in her face and forgetting that she had ever been there. Instead, he opened the door wider and stepped aside wordlessly.

She walked past him and into the living room, looking around the room as she took off her coat, placing it on the desk. Severus came silently into the room after her, leaning against the doorframe with his arms folded across his thin chest. Lily turned to face him. "Well?" he asked, somewhat coldly.

"I see you've redecorated," she said.

He raised an eyebrow sardonically, ignoring what she had just said. "Mrs. Potter, why are you here?"

"I heard about your parents." She gave him a sympathetic glance.

"It's not as if it was a surprise. You know very well how often he'd go out drinking." He still watched her carefully.

She sighed. "Do you mind if I sit down?"

"Yes."

She sighed again. "Severus, please."

"Why are you here? You said yourself years ago that people like us had no business associating with each other."

She winced. "I did say that, and- and that's why I'm here. I'm here to apologize."

"You want to apologize," he repeated blankly.

"Yes." She sat down on the straight-backed chair in front of the fireplace. "I wronged you, when we were in school."

He laughed coldly, the edges of his laugh bordering on hysteria. "That's not what you said then."

She nodded. "I was wrong then."

"So what changed your mind? Why are you here now?"

She cleared her throat awkwardly. "My dad. He died last week. Cancer."

He was silent, but her eyes desperately sought his. "I spoke with him just before- he said that you visited him."

"I did."

"Why?"

He was silent for a moment before speaking. "He was kind to me, as a child. And he wasn't as fickle as some people are."

She winced at that, knowing his biting tone was directed towards her. "Severus-"

"You cast me off." His tone was cold.

"You were falling in with the wrong crowd!" she protested weakly.

"I was a poor half-blood in Slytherin house. What other option was there for me? Do you know how many threats I received, how many times I was attacked by other students?"

"You could have spoken with someone about it, maybe one of the teachers."

He sneered. "Who? Slughorn? He never cared about anyone who wouldn't amount to anything in his mind. And McGonagall or Dumbledore would never do anything for me since I wasn't one of their precious Gryffindors. And when I made one mistake, my only friend rejected me. What else was left for me to do but fall in with the darker side?"

"You- you haven't-?" she questioned hesitantly.

He knew what she was asking. "I haven't sworn to him yet."

"But you are considering it."

He nodded.

"And if I offered you an alternative?"

"It would depend on what you are offering."

"Come to Christmas dinner with me," she said impulsively. "We can talk more there."

"With you and Potter, you mean."

"Yes. And Sirius and Remus." His eyes darkened.

"They'll behave," she hurried to say. "I've made sure of it."

His eyes were still hesitant. "Please, Severus? For me? I want to try and start again."

His face darkened. "I'm sure I'll regret this," he muttered. "Fine. Whatever. I'll go."

Her face brightened. "You will?"

"That's what I said. Weren't you listening?" he grumbled.

She jumped up from the chair, grabbing her coat from the desk. "Oh, thank you, Severus, you won't regret it."

"I'm regretting it already."

"Oh, don't be so gloomy," she said, falling easily back into their old familiar banter. "It's almost Christmas, Severus!"

"Yes, I can feel the appalling happiness of the masses every time I go out. It's practically nauseating." He grimaced. Lily moved to where he stood by the door. She could already see the shadows beginning to leave his eyes. Impulsively, she reached out and hugged him, ignoring his squawk of protest. After a moment, she could feel his long, thin arms holding her tight.


End file.
